When you hear Star Wars you might think of Darth Vader, Yoda, or a lightsaber duel. When I hear Star Wars I think of the a lot of things, but one of the ideas that comes to mind is choices. Afterall that is what the trilogy is all about.
Luke Skywalker grew up on Tatooine, an oridnary planet, the similarities to New Mexico (my home state) uncanny. Skywalker lived an ordinary life. Nothing exciting really happened to him, but he craved a excitement and the unknown.
When he was confronted with the loss of his aunt and uncle and the familiar, he made a choice to save Princess Leia. As the story progresses he continually is faced with decisions, that become more difficult. Until the conclusion of the story when he is faced with two options: good and evil.
As a child, I viewed this decision as easy. Luke should obviously know not to join the Dark Side, let go of the anger, and defeat the Emporer. As I got older, I realized that this decision is a difficult one. It's an internal struggle that all of us can relate to in some way. Whether we are struggling with something serious or an everday choice.
There are a lot of these Golden Fleece stories that convey this idea, such as Lord of the Rings. Essentially Frodo and Luke have to make similar decisions. They both are tempted by a darker side of themselves that they overcome. Both Luke and Frodo understand what is at stake, they have seen what happened to Vader and Smeagol.
Another thing the padawan and the hobbit have in common is their support system. Luke has Han Solo and Princess Leia, and Frodo has Sam. Having friends that will support you is important. This is a piece of advice that can be applied to all ages. Without a support group, it makes it difficult to over come your struggles.
At the climax of the film, Luke is faced with a huge decision, to give into his hate and destroy his astranged father or to let go of his hate and defeat evil. No one else can step in for Luke and help him. It is his choice.
That internal struggle, whatever it might be, it is yours to make.Will you be a Luke or a Vader?
Your writing has a few spelling errors and erroneous words. There are also missing commas in some places, and unnecessary commas in others. This makes it difficult to read. I want to read what you have to say, because the material is interesing, but you lose your credibility and my attention with all the mistakes. It conflicts with the natural inner reading voice.
ReplyDeleteI'll go through this, and try to fix it up more. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteWhen I hear Star Wars I think of the a lot of things, but one of the ideas that comes to mind is choices.
ReplyDeleteFocus Han. Don’t distract us with a lot of other things. This essay is about “one of the ideas.” Stick to it. And jumping ahead, I see you are talking about a particular kind of choice.
“Star Wars is about moral choices.”
That is your opening sentence. And I see that you tweeted this better thesis not longer after you wrote this piece. Good. You are thinking in better sentences and theses now.
Afterall that is what the trilogy is all about.
Afterall is not a word and your thesis is not an after all, or an afterthought, until you prove it. So that is a throwaway sentence. It’s clutter.
Writing is rewriting Han and rewriting means looking at your first draft and finding the important sentences, fleshing out the incomplete ideas, and tossing the clutter and filler.
As I got older, I realized that this decision is a difficult one.
That sentence is an incomplete idea. You quickly leap over this opportunity to talk about your knowledge. What moral choices did you have to make in your life that gave you a deeper understanding of Star Wars and Sci-Fi?
Do not think your contribution is unnecessary or that you can avoid it. Your knowledge is the heart of your work.
There are a lot of these Golden Fleece stories…
What’s a Golden Fleece story? Again, another incomplete idea. You also discuss Frodo and Luke as if your entire audience has seen these character's respective movies. You need to walk the fine line between boring people who know the stories and helping out those who may not.
Essentially Frodo and Luke have to make similar decisions.
Try this...
“The hero of J.R.R. Tolkien’s fantast trilogy, Frodo Baggins, must overcome shortcomings and make decisions just like Luke Skywalker.”
But I like this piece. You are making an interesting argument. It is a good first draft.
Your "Darth" Advocate piece has potential too.
The Devil’s Advocate assignment stresses rewriting. By counter-arguing against your ideas, you strengthen them. You face the audience in advance and prepare to meet their challenges, just like a lawyer practices defending his or her client.
It is a piece of writing not intended for publication. It is writing as preparation only. I believe in drafts that look nothing like the final piece. This is the kind of effort you should put into the ideas you care about.
Your Darth Advocate did a good job defining the stereotype of a fanboy. Now I’d like to read your rebuttal. Write a piece in favor of the fanboy and tear that stereotype to shreds, point by point.
That is how you develop a good argument and essay.
Good work.